How do we decide if it's time to put our dearest furry friend down?

He is 19. He is blind, unable to walk easily, can no longer use the cat box, still enjoys his food heartily, has very labored breathing and has lost scads of weight. Tonight, we came home to a completely craptastic bathroom, covered in cat scat and pee, all of which he had been stumbling through repeatedly. The ensuing bath was not at all dignified, nor did he appreciate being blown dry.

We have ceded the bathroom to him for the last 2 months or so since that is the space he chose when he could no longer see. When he began to decide that he no longer appreciated his personal, CLEAN cat box and would come out to pee and poop in the living room or hallway, we started to close him in. He does get cuddles and chats and scritches and responds as warmly as he ever has to them - many purrs, through which he can barely breathe.

Am I keeping him alive selfishly because he is truly one of those special cats? Am I even thinking of putting him to sleep because I don't want to deal with incontinent old friend? I can't figure this one out and could use any advice you've got.

Thanks.

Per Claudia's request, I am posting regarding my monstrous and unfinished HP piece, "Lest I Wither". It's not that I have abandoned it - exactly. It's more that I have no idea where it is going and can't even recall if I ever had a clue. This is the fic that taught me never to post a WIP. I am sorry to those who are hoping that I will update it soon. Friends, I see no updates in the foreseeable future. Forgive me!

...is queer.

That is to say, he is now eating chick starter feed.

New baby chicks - an obvious triumph of optimism over experience.

On advice, we will wait until early next week. Yay. At least I feel like decisions have been made and am far less upset about it now. Still unhappy that it has to happen, but at least the decisions are made.
Thanks for the support, friends. It really has helped!

I did manage to tear myself out of bed, despite the curled up and snorfling husband, the curled up and snorfling kitten on his hip and the curled up and purring black cat on mine. I went for a walk with my friend, L, and we had coffee and talked about all sorts of important and gossipy things.

She has been through the WLS two years before me and she knows exactly where I am now. I am so successful that I am testing to see if I can screw it up. Not exercising, not eating enough protein, really fighting myself to take my vitamins and meds and generally testing all the limits I can. Despite myself, I continue to lose weight and am now below 170.

Writing is going fairly well, if oddly. I seem to be coming up with short bits and spurts, sometimes poetry, sometimes prose-poems, sometimes just slash stories. I suppose it all counts, although what I intend to be writing for writing group, my murder mystery, is stubbornly stalled.

In other news, I have an inuksuk! A tiny little desk-sized inuksuk. Thanks, imkalena!
If you don't know what one is, as I did not, here is a sample picture.



Needless to say, the kitten thinks it represents a challenge!

kinseyx hath podfic'ed me. He's got a nice, lightly accented voice that reads especially well for the Dreams series which is told from John Doggett's pov. It's an interesting experience to hear my stories read by someone else with the intonations and emphases that they choose. It is also a serious ego-boost. Hooray for Amplificathon which insures that no sightless slasher will go unserved!
If you're interested, you can find them here.

In Dreams (#1)
Begins Responsibility (#2)

Thanks, SK Lee!

This makes me proud to be American, female and Jewish.


From Rhi -- thanks, dear!

This morning, I am off to see my surgeon for my regular check up. I am looking forward to this! It helps that he is adorable, of course. 116 lbs down, 20 to go!

Then I have a private adult Hebrew student and a quiet day of meetings with my rabbi and cantor and an attempt to get all my stuff done. I'm actually looking forward to this; part of this could be that I have NO evening meetings tonight. I NEVER have a free Thursday night, so it feels like a snow-day.

Off I go with my heating pad, my coffee and my husband - talk about a trio of security items!